Questions from Candy.com (CC) will appear in plain script and Mr. Owl’s (MO) responses will be in bold.
CC: Mr. Owl, your reputation precedes you, it’s an honor to speak with you.
MO: Thank You-HOO for having me.
CC: Tell us a little bit about the Tootsie Pop.
MO: Tens of millions are produced everyday by Too-HOO-tsie Roll Industries. They’ve been one of the company’s most successful products since they were invented by Mr. Luke Weisgram in 1931. Too-HOO-tsie Pops shall soon line the walls of every home in these United States. HOO-HOO.
CC: We look forward to the day. Now, we all know that Tootsie pops already come in a variety of great flavors including chocolate, cherry, grape, orange, raspberry, blue raspberry, strawberry, watermelon, pomegranate and banana. That’s a lot of ground already covered, but what about new developments? Can we expect any new flavors or innovations within the next 5 years?
MO: As we speak, Too-HOO-tsie Roll scientists are working tirelessly to realize bread-fruit, cashew apple, spicy chili relenos and mouse flavored pops.
MO: HOO-HOO! My apologies, I meant muskrat-HOO, pardon, Mousse, er vanilla- Mousse flavored pops.
CC: Sounds delightful.
MO: Doesn’t it?
CC: Moving on—I just had a banana pop, and while I’m usually leery of banana flavored candy, I found this pretty authentic. What’s the secret to your success?
MO: If I told you-HOO that, you-HOO might wake up to-HOO-morrow as a pellet.
CC: Trade secret eh? We can respect that. It’s no use asking how many licks it takes to get to the center of one of these suckers then?
MO: I could tell you-HOO, two-HOO thousand… But I’d be lying.